


Alpha Zero

by saintsavage



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alpha Lexa, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, Med Student Clarke, Omega Clarke, Professor Lexa, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-05
Updated: 2017-01-20
Packaged: 2018-08-29 03:12:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 16,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8473261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saintsavage/pseuds/saintsavage
Summary: Unpresented Clarke Griffin is trying to navigate the new world of dynamics and university life along with keeping track of the large cluster of strays that she calls friends. All she wants is to be the top of her class. Life has Plans.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I'm officially giving this story a preface/warning, because I'm really tired of being harassed. The warning is this: if you hate Bellamy, don't read this story. Period. Because I don't. He's not a saint but he isn't some big, bad, evil monster either, and I don't intend to portray him as such.
> 
> Also, a second sort of warning, this isn't a hardcore Clexa story. It's more of a Clarke story than anything, which features her relationship with Lexa. I didn't intend for that to happen, but it's where the story went. If that's not your thing, then feel free to skip this. Thank you.

Alphas came first, as they did in most things. That wasn't arrogance but scientific fact. It started with a thirteen year old girl. She was in the hospital, complaining of stomach pains. The doctors ignored her and chalked it up to period cramps but decided to keep her when she grew distraught.  
  
She had a fever that went up during the night, at some point she grew agitated. Clarke could only imagine, a confused girl pacing her room, tearing at anything that touched her. She felt for her, alone in a pre-evolution hospital with no one who understood or could even help her. _That poor girl._  
  
Agitation grew to anger. A few nurses were injured. And then, well... Clarke didn't need to read the rest to know what happened next. It was the first ever incident of an alpha - one in rut to boot - and they'd simply declared it to be some kind of mania.  
  
They'd sent the girl home after a few days but had run a full bloodwork panel and what it turned up was shocking. Well, shocking then. Now it's just a sign that you're probably an asshole.  
  
Clarke slammed her textbook shut without meaning too and a few other students in the library glanced at her. _Dammit I'm not thinking about that dick Bellamy. Nope. This is me not thinking about him._ Instead she opened another book, this one focused on 'Alpha Zero'.  
  
Officially her name was protected, her face blocked out in all the photos. All Clarke could make out was a fall of dark hair. _I wonder if I'll meet her tomorrow? Wouldn't that be something, Alpha Zero herself teaching (or trying to teach) a group of pre-med students about alphas? It would be unreal._  
  
And so, _so_ good for her resume.  
  
Only twenty students managed to get in to the class. Twenty out of over a hundred and fifty applicants. Medicine was nothing if not cut-throat, more so when it had changed and continued to change so much in ten years. Alpha Zero had been a veritable sucker punch to the health field. There were maybe fifty doctors in the country fully certified to treat the different dynamics.  
  
Then again she'd been the herald of change in more ways than one. After her case thousands and thousands of alphas began presenting all over the world. That was the first wave. Initially everyone thought it was some kind of crazy virus or something, more so when the men ended up what was now known in the common vernacular as knots. Female alphas were easier, they didn't visibly look any different.  
  
And then alphas set off the second wave, known as the omega wave, in 20... _shit_.  
  
"The fuck you even doing here Clarke." She didn't even need to look up to know who was interrupting her 'Do Not Disturb Me On Pain Of Death' study time.  
  
"Hello Octavia, it's nice to see you too. Yes I'm doing well, and you are?"  
  
"Whatever." The brassy alpha flopped in to the chair across from Clarke and had the audacity to set her filthy boots on the table next to Clarke's $300 textbooks. "So, heard you finally dumped the asshole. Wanted to give you my congrats and buy you a bagel or some shit."  
  
Several people were openly glaring and Clarke couldn't blame them. The pre-med program at Arkadia was brutal and Octavia didn't look like she belonged anywhere near a college, let alone disturbing their precious study time.  
  
Truth was Octavia was a certified genius but preferred mechanics. She even had an internship with NASA once upon a time before she got bored and cruised her way back to Annapolis. It was how she'd always been since her and that asshole who will not be named had jumped from foster home to foster home.  
  
When he had aged out of the system Octavia had ended up at the Griffin household. From there she'd become fast friends with their only daughter, Clarke, opposites though they were. Their friendship had survived some serious storms too, from Clarke dating Bellamy, Octavia disowning Bellamy for getting her boyfriend locked up, and now Clarke had left Bellamy - for good.  
  
"I'm 90% sure I texted you to let you know I was studying for my new classes."  
  
"And I'm 100% sure those classes haven't even started yet nerdbrain." True, but to stay competitive in the courses she was taking Clarke couldn't study _enough_.  
  
"Octavia."  
  
"Clarke."  
  
"Fine, but you're buying me lunch, not a freaking bagel. And coffee, good coffee!"


	2. Chapter 2

"So why aren't you bugging Raven anyway?" Clarke picked at was a surprisingly delicious sandwich from a deli down the block. It was hard to have an appetite when she was so stressed about school. And, well, everything else.  
  
Octavia rolled her eyes before taking a bite out of her salami-ham-banana pepper concoction. _Eww_. "She's being all gross about Finn. Fucking intolerable."  
  
Raven and Finn had been a thing since as far back as Clarke could remember, and she'd known the future engineer since they were thirteen. There had been that brief, awkward period when the couple was split up that Clarke had dated Finn, but otherwise they were basically one person. And, as Octavia put it, they were at times... overly sentimental.  
  
At least, when they weren't screaming at the top of their lungs over toilet paper.  
  
But if Octavia was talking about something as boring as Finn and Raven, and not lovingly using the term Fiven, that meant Lincoln's case had taken a turn for the worse. "I take it Lincoln's hearing didn't go well?"  
  
"They pushed it back a week. On the bright side with all these bullshit omega laws they're bandying about they might 'release him in to the custody of his alpha' soooo." A smear of mustard made its way on to the brunette's cheek and the wrapping from her sandwich was littered with tomato and lettuce. Octavia had never mastered table manners.  
  
Deciding to take pity Clarke learned forward, offering a napkin and pointing to her face. On a different day she'd have just sent a picture to the group chat, but the idea of some assholes handing Lincoln over like he was some kind of pet just because he was an omega... "Now that's gross."  
  
"I know." Octavia clumsily wiped off her face and tossed the wadded up napkin on the table. She was already eyeing Clarke's sandwich. _I swear she's a bottomless pit._ "But if it gets him out... I hate that he's in there because of me. Because of fucking _Bellamy_."  
  
"What can I say, your brother is a dick." With a nod she gave up her lunch, what little appetite she had gone now. Between Lincoln being in jail and talking about Bellamy... well, it was just hard to stomach either situation without feeling guilty and frustrated because there wasn't anything she could do.  
  
"You'd know. Did he really try to make you drop out because he felt 'abandoned'?" Octavia's sharp eyes were focused directly on Clarke's in that unnerving way she had. It was like she was digging for even more reasons to hate her brother.  
  
"Not drop out, exactly, but he didn't like that I was pre-med. Said it was taking up too much of my time. Then he had to go and say I was too stressed and that's probably why I hadn't presented yet." In hindsight Clarke wished she'd screamed at him, had put up a fight before telling him it was over, but her reaction had been to burst in to tears.  
  
Octavia looked pissed. "That's just low. Should of told him he wasn't alpha enough." _If I thought of it I would have, believe me._  
  
"I swear ever since he joined the academy he just... he changed. I don't like it and I'm not going to put up with that bullshit. I don't have to present to be worth something. A lot of people haven't! It's why they've started using the term beta." Her rant was more forceful than she'd intended and a few tables down a woman turned to stare.  
  
Seeing that Clarke was uncomfortable Octavia turned her head and glared until the woman got up and left. Then she went back to focusing on Clarke. "Good for you, there's nothing wrong with being unpresented, or a beta, or however you want to describe it. You're amazing, a solid 10, and he's not worth it."  
  
"I keep telling myself that, but..." _But it doesn't feel like it._ "I'm worried about my classes. They're getting more and more specialized and everyone else in the course is an alpha or omega. What if I can't keep up?"  
  
"Dude, you're Clarke fucking Griffin, you can do anything and you know it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry these are so short, they're just easier to write that way.


	3. Chapter 3

_Okay, this is it. You can do this, just like Octavia said, you're Clarke fucking Griffin and you don't need a dynamic to be a doctor._  
  
After hesitating in front of the door for a good fifteen minutes - she was early, she was _always_ early - Clarke entered the room only to find she wasn't alone: a slender woman stood at the desk arranging papers, probably someone's TA. She looked too young to even be that.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't- my next-" Throat tight Clarke tries to spit out the words, to explain, but it's impossible. They're caught in her throat, lodged there painfully. She can feel sweat beading up at the base of her neck and the small of her back.  
  
The woman at the desk has turned to face her, all green eyes and wild dark hair, and she looks concerned. Had she the words Clarke would have assured her that she was fine, put on her professional mien and smoothed the situation over with aplomb, but she can't. She can't talk, she can hardly _breathe_. All she can focus on is those eyes even as her brain scrambles for a solution to this sudden madness.  
  
The smells are what she notices most: cloying, clinging, permeating the air like fire. Perfume and sweat and ink surround her in a cloud that's damn near tangible. It makes her tug the air in through her open mouth but then she can almost _taste_ them.  
  
Shaky hands drop her bag with a loud clunk. _What's happening to me?_ Every time she breathes it's harder, the weight on her chest growing. It feels a little like dying. Her whole body shudders as she raises her hands to her face, her neck, brushing away the moisture gathered there. Clarke's eyelids droop heavily, drowsiness hanging over her shoulders like an old friend.  
  
The stranger - _an alpha, she's an alpha, I can smell her, why can I smell her?_ \- has started approaching her with caution, hands up as though Clarke is something feral and easily provoked. "It's okay, you're going to be fine." Her voice sounds so sincere, as if this is normal, like she's come across half-hysterical undergrads for years. _Is that it? Am I having a breakdown over a class?_ "My name is Lexa, I teach a class here about Alpha and Omega Dynamics. What's your name?"  
  
Clarke whines, high-pitched and fearful. She asks herself again: _What's happening to me?_ It's a constant litany in the back of her brain. Desperately she tries to go over the symptoms, to diagnose herself like the doctor she one day hopes to be, but she can't think. It's like the process has been jammed.  
  
It's more terrifying than anything that's happening with her body. Bright little Clarke Griffin without a thought in her head. She whines again.  
  
Finally she chokes out an answer. "Clarke. I... Clarke."  
  
The alpha smiles and nods, and the _relief_ Clarke feels at that. Like she's done something good, has pleased. _Wait. This isn't possible. Am I...?_ The pieces click in to place, her dilemma solving itself with remarkable clarity in a flash.  
  
_I'm presenting, aren't I?_  
  
"Very good Clarke. It seems that you are presenting. I'm going to call a friend of mine to cover my class and then I'll take you to the clinic. If I leave you now you might panic - as I'm sure you're aware of if you were taking my class. Is that alright?" A nod is all she can muster, mess that she is, panting hard and heavy in an effort to take more air in.  
  
The alpha - Lexa - pulls out her phone and speed dials someone, having a brief conversation before leading Clarke out a side door. The closeness is a strange sort of balm to the chaos in her body. Soothing. Clarke has read about that, how the scent of an alpha can make the transition easier. Especially when it's the alpha who triggered the response.  
  
Whatever the reason, Clarke is grateful for the warm arm around her waist, for the foresight Lexa had in taking her outside and through the quad rather than down the halls. With her new sense of smell... she can't even imagine. Her stomach rolls at the very thought of being dragged through the hallway.  
  
Instead of focusing on her dilemma she watches Lexa from the corner of her eye, hating herself for being pleased with the picture presented to her. Full, round mouth, high cheekbones, face like a cameo but sterner. Stronger. She's beautiful, like a painting. _Oh my god Clarke, stop being creepy about your teacher, for fuck's sake._  
  
It's only a few minutes before Lexa helps her down the stairs and in to the faculty parking lot. The fresh air is helping to clear her head a little but it's the heady smell of Lexa - rich, earthy, safe - that's calming her down more, Clarke's sure of that.  
  
"Forgive me if I ask but I'm told it's better if I keep you talking. Have you never been around an alpha before, in a romantic way?" Lexa smiles at her, encouraging.  
  
Clarke's body feels heavy, leaden. She just wants to curl up around Lexa and not move for a week. But that's inappropriate, very, very much so, and it makes her struggling body flush guiltily and instead she focuses on the question. She can't even be annoyed with just how personal it is given the thoughts she's having. "Have, I have." Thinking of it makes her smile. _Bellamy is going to shit bricks._  
  
Clarke watches as Lexa nods to herself, wanting the other woman's attention so badly she can hardly stand it. But the professor doesn't seem to notice or is kind enough to ignore the fact that Clarke just has to smell like the horniest person on the planet.  
  
_You know, if I wasn't presenting I think I'd die of mortification._ A thought follows that one, unbidden. _It's not my fault she's got the jawline of a greek goddess and gorgeous skin and smells so damn good- no! I may be an omega now but I am not having these thoughts. Nope. Not at all._  
  
"I thought as much. I do apologize," And she does genuinely look remorseful. Odd, that. "I try not to have the unpresented in my class for this reason." That got Clarke's back up, her earlier feelings of inadequacy springing up amidst the chaos that was presenting. Lexa noticed. "Not out of arrogance, I promise. This has happened before, though not so quickly. Usually it takes a week or two of exposure." _Huh?_  
  
She gently leads her to a sleek black mustang while Clarke considers her words. Why would it take exposure? And why is she so special that she yanks the omega out of people? "Why? Wait," _Think Clarke, you know this._ And then it comes and she has to laugh, because of all the luck. She didn't just react to an alpha, to her professor, oh no. Apparently it took something like a nuclear explosion to bring her dynamic out.  
  
"You're her."  
  
There's no dramatic denial, just a simple nod of her head. A lion acknowledging a lamb as she helps Clarke in to the car. "I am." She laughs again, leaning back into the cool leather. When the door closes she's overwhelmed by her sense of smell again, only now it's just her, just Lexa. Woodsmoke, warmth, rain. Eyes close and she just drinks all the nuances in, not even trying to help herself.  
  
Clarke listens as Lexa opens the driver's side door and starts the engine. The silence is a bit stifling combined with the smells. It's like drowning in Lexa, in everything the alpha is. It's just too much and Clarke desperately needs a distraction. One comes in the form of the obvious, her eyes popping open and turning the the alpha with a bright smile, because it happened, it finally happened. She wasn't broken after all. "I'm an omega."  
  
"Yes, you are." Lexa is smiling now, softly as she turns in to the clinic parking lot.  
  
"My ex is going to be pissed."  
  
Understatement of the _century_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We finally have Lexa! And actual plot! Look at me go! Also I wanted to include a little bit about everybody we've met so far, including known dynamic and where they are world-wise. A lot of things have changed because they aren't on a spaceship but I tried to keep them true to their positions there.
> 
> Octavia Blake - Alpha, mechanic. Drop out.  
> Bellamy Blake - Alpha, in police academy.  
> Clarke Griffin - Omega (newly!), med student at Arkadia University.  
> Lexa To-Be-Announced - Alpha, professor and competitor/coach in professional alpha fights. (which we probably won't be seeing unless I change my mind, but it's basically MMA but alphas)


	4. Chapter 4

Clarke is checked in by a guy she recognizes from that morning's biology class, Monty something. They'd all been forced to play one of those awkward introductory name games, having to rhyme their first name with a word. He'd gone with 'Monty Daunty', smiling uncertainly. He seemed sweet. If she wasn't losing the fight to stay lucid she might have said hello.  
  
"Do you know her name?"  
  
"Clarke, she said it was Clarke." Lexa is all but supporting her weight as they stand in front of the wide desk and Clarke blatantly stares at the alpha's profile - it's not like she doesn't have an excuse. The wanting has subsided (thank god) but she's still fascinated and unable to hide it.  
  
Right now it's her hair. At first it had just been dark, then sort of brown. But looking at it now under the (obnoxious) fluorescent lighting Clarke can see it's veined with gold and even a bit of red, like marble. Her hands keep making aborted attempts to reach out and touch because as glossy as it is it has to be so soft-  
  
 _Clarke, stop it!_ Her self-scolding at least makes her look back at the desk and sort of pay attention, watching as Monty ducked his head, typing something into the computer before looking back at them with a helpful smile. "Last name?"  
  
"I'm afraid she left her bag behind. I felt it was important to get her here as soon as possible." Lexa is cool and self-assured, as though she had wilting omegas dangling from her arms every day. _Maybe she does?_ The very idea makes Clarke snicker, imagining Lexa balancing seven or eight with a cocky grin while Bellamy watched, mind-boggled.  
  
At the desk, Monty sheepishly ducked his head. "I need her full name. I can't... I can't check her in without it." He sounds apologetic but Lexa frowns anyway.  
  
When it becomes clear that Monty is quite serious she turns to Clarke, shifting so she can cup her face in both hands. The expression on her Diana-worthy face is very serious - no doubt she hopes that it will help Clarke focus. Clarke kind of hopes that too. "Clarke I need to know what your last name is. Can you tell me? Can you do that for me?"  
  
"Griffin." The word is wrenched from her, a raspy whisper. Monty looks awed but Clarke feels like Lexa just reached inside her and yanked hard. It's not a pleasant feeling. It burned.  
  
Another smile before she pats Clarke's arm. "Very good Clarke, you're doing so well. Just a little bit longer, okay?" Her attention goes back to Monty... who looks absolutely floored. "Do you require anything else?"  
  
"No- no I can look her up from that." He's typing but stops in order to gush. "I've never seen an alpha able to get an answer from a presenting omega like that before. Usually they're all sleepy and blank. That was incredible, I mean-"  
  
"I believe you were checking her in?" The words have an edge.  
  
Suitably chastened he went back to typing, eyes downcast. "Oh, yeah, sorry. Sorry. If you can just have a seat somebody should call you back in a few minutes."  
  
Initially Lexa lead them to two side-by-side seats but Clarke's skin had begun to itch more insistently than before and the smells of the clinic - bleach, sickness, metal - were too much for her freshly awakened senses. The only relief came from getting closer to Lexa. She needed more and shamelessly attempted to climb in to the alpha's lap. "It hurts."  
  
While she did stop Clarke's movement Lexa compromised, beginning to rub soothing circles on her back; it helped a little, but not by much. "I know, I know. _Ste yuj_."  
  
The door opened and a black nurse appeared, glancing around the waiting room. "Clarke Griffin?"  
  
Lexa responded for her - which was for the best since Clarke didn't think she could move - and hauled Clarke up with surprising strength for someone so slender. "She's here."  
  
The nurse hrumphed at them both but seemed to be particularly disappointed with Lexa. "Again _gada_? How many is it now?"  
  
"I have not counted, Indra, but I assure you this one was a surprise."  
  
"Uh huh. Well, let's take her on back. After we get her vitals she'll need to decide how she wants to proceed from here. We have a few alphas on standby-" Clarke growled. She didn't mean to, but there it was. Indra chuckled. "Yeah, thought so."  
  
Together the three head down a stark white hallway, stopping briefly for the nurse to get Clarke's height, weight, and blood pressure. "At any rate, there's also sedation, though we don't like that option, false alpha scent, or, well, withholding but that's just crazy talk." Lexa said nothing, she didn't have to. She'd unwillingly gone through that option and they all knew it.  
  
They entered a small room typical of most doctor's offices. Lexa helped Clarke up on to the awkward bed-table-thing before leaning against the sink. Indra left but returned fairly quickly. "So, Clarke, you're a healthy young woman from what I can see, everything seems to be going normal with your presentation though it does seem to be more intense than average. I need verbal conformation from you as to how you want to get through this, do you understand?"  
  
"Yes, understand." Her brain felt like absolute mush, but she grasped what was happening to and around her - a small mercy, that. She'd read case files of omegas who went comatose during their presentation. Others went wild and tore at their skin until they had to be sedated.  
  
Blue eyes moved around the room before settling on Lexa. "I... I want." And she did, how she did. Those eyes and that mouth and her scent. Clarke licked her lips. "Will you stay?" She wants to say please, it feels so weak but she thinks if Lexa leaves she just might curl up and die.  
  
"Of course I'll stay Clarke."  
  
Relief floods her, followed by guilt. There's something important Lexa must do, more important than holding Clarke's hand through this... "Wait. No. Classes-"  
  
"My classes can be covered by Anya for the next few days, there's no need to worry yourself. If anything she's more strict than I am so you should be grateful." The alpha smiles, offering absolution, before her attention is shifting to the nurse. "Indra?"  
  
The woman raises a brow before nodding. "I'll get a room ready then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next few chapters might not be that long. I got a new job and, while I have them written, I'm afraid I won't always have the time to expand them with more details like I usually do.
> 
> Also yes, there is some trigedasleng. Couldn't resist.
> 
> gada - girl  
> Ste yuj - be strong


	5. Chapter 5

Lexa put an arm around her, humming softly while they waited. Clarke wanted to stretch, to lie down, but the idea of sitting back on crinkly paper and staring at a colorful poster telling her to eat vegetables wasn't exactly appealing.  
  
By now everything she wore seemed unbearably itchy and uncomfortable, like she was wearing sandpaper instead of cotton blend, and her head was throbbing. Headaches were normal during the first day or two of presenting but that didn't mean she was thrilled with the development.  
  
It made her even more grateful for Lexa's presence. The closer they were the duller the symptoms become, like the woman was a drug or something. Clarke didn't even feel guilty about burying her face in the alpha's neck now that she had permission, waiting for the nurse to come back.  
  
Once she did Indra led them down a couple of hallways until they reached what Clarke figured were presentation rooms. There were only four doors (it was the university clinic and by now most people their age had already presented) and each was neatly labeled except for the one on the far right. "You'll be staying here for the duration."  
  
Relieved Clarke managed to leave Lexa's side and push open the heavy door. The room was simple, just a bed, dresser, and end tables with a door that connected to a private bathroom. Everything was in muted shades of green and yellow, all of the wood light in color. It was meant to be soothing but Clarke couldn't care less. She went for the bed and plopped down, curling up on her side.  
  
"A few things before I leave you be." Indra and Lexa stepped in to the room, allowing the door to close behind them - shutting out all scent and sound except for their own. "A nurse will stop by for morning and evening vital checks. If you need any assistance aside from that there's a green call button by the bed."  
  
Indra made sure Clarke looked at the button and understood before continuing. "There are clothes in the dresser there and basic hygienic supplies in the bathroom. I'd imagine your skin isn't too happy with you right about now." That perked Clarke up enough that she was sitting and nodding gratefully.  
  
"Meals will be brought in three times a day. If you have any special dietary requests let us know." Another nod from Clarke, this one a touch sleepier. "If you'd like we can send someone by your classes to pick up your assignments but if you'd like my professional opinion I would wait. You won't be able to focus and stress can extend the presenting process."  
  
That was the last thing she wanted. "No work."  
  
Even though she was out of it, Clarke knew she would like Indra later. The woman was no-nonsense and straight to the point, unafraid to speak her mind. It wasn't a personality everyone could appreciate but, having grown up with a world-class surgeon for a mother (who had some control issues) Clarke was one of the few who did. It made everything easier.  
  
"Smart girl." Indra nodded and checked something off on her clipboard. "Now Lexa has done this a few times so I'm not going to walk her through procedure but I wanted you to be aware there was one and if any time you aren't comfortable or want her to leave I want you to press the red button there, on the wall, and we'll take care of you."  
  
Leave? She never wanted Lexa to leave.  
  
"Alright, that's everything. Any questions?" Clarke shook her head, anxious to get out of her clothes and in to something more comfortable so she could sleep. She was half ready to change in front of Indra, modesty be damned.  
  
"I'll leave you to it then. Lexa I'll make sure to bring your bag in later." Before the nurse could leave Lexa, who had her fists casually balled against her sides, asked for something in a lowered voice. Indra's eyebrows raised in surprise. "But you never-"  
  
Clarke didn't like that. "What." It wasn't even a question, more of a sullen demand.  
  
They both looked at her, trying and failing to come off as reassuring. Indra looked like she was reconsidering leaving Lexa with Clarke and Lexa herself just looked uncertain. Was something wrong? She must have been telegraphing her fear because in two long strides Lexa was kneeling at her feet by the bed, radiating calm. "Shhh, hush Clarke. It's nothing."  
  
"Tell me." She sounded like she was four years old and on the verge of the tantrum but Clarke couldn't find the energy to be embarrassed by that fact. Maybe later.  
  
"I asked for a suppressant, that's all."  
  
"Oh." If only her brain didn't feel like it was soaked in gin. She wanted to ask why Indra seemed so surprised by that if Lexa did this all the time. She wanted to be more annoyed by that. So many things but all she could do was nod and watch as Lexa started to leave the room, only she was whining before she could. _Lexa can't leave._  
  
Lexa patiently stopped, meeting Clarke's pleading gaze. "Clarke it'll only be a moment."  
  
"Please." She could actually feel her lip quivering.  
  
The alpha sighed heavily before turning back to the nurse. If she was irritated she masked it very well. Then again, Clarke wasn't so sure she would have cared in the state she was in. All she wanted was Lexa with her... and softer clothes. "Very well. Indra, can you bring it here?"  
  
"Sure thing."  
  
Lexa smiled and turned back to Clarke, more like a parent dealing with a recalcitrant toddler than an alpha with a presenting omega who definitely smelled like a weird blend of happiness, horniness, confusion, and pain. "Why don't you find something to wear? The bathroom is through that door. I promise I'll stay right here."  
  
"Can I leave the door open?" The idea of being shut off away from the other woman was terrifying.  
  
Lexa's tone was placating. "Yes."  
  
Clarke went to the dresser, opening it to reveal sweaters and sweatpants, all in shades of pink, grey, and blue. She intended on grabbing the first outfit she could (not expecting much since this was a clinic after all) but was immediately she was engrossed by how _soft_ everything felt. She ran her hands through the shirts and genuinely considered throwing them on the floor and curling up in them before Lexa cleared her throat.  
  
Oh. Right. She was changing. Clarke grabbed a pale blue sweater and a pair of gray sweatpants; not even bothering with the bathroom she changed right there, earning a huff of surprise from Lexa. "Clarke!" She sounded shocked and it was kind of adorable.  
  
Clarke went back to the bed, now able to appreciate that it too was incredibly soft, the threadcount off the charts. She watched as Indra returned and administered a greenish shot to Lexa's arm. The alpha didn't even flinch.  
  
"You're sure you are okay? If you're not I can't leave you here, you know that." Indra was more wary than she'd been before, kept looking at Clarke protectively. It was her job to keep her patients safe, after all, but it was ridiculous. Clarke was perfectly safe with Lexa.  
  
"I can control myself, she is safe with me." Her look clearly said: and from me.  
  
Finally Indra left, awkwardness filling up the room in her wake. Lying back on the bed, curling in the middle like a kitten, Clarke watched Lexa watch her. "Now what?"  
  
"We stay here until your body settles. It should only-" She sounded distant, professional, like she was going over something for a class. It made Clarke feel like she was just a duty to Lexa, a burden borne. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.  
  
Her tone was snappy despite her current weariness. "I know that."  
  
"Ah, you want to know what the two of us are actually going to be doing?" Lexa was teasing her, the professional gone in place of someone else, a person Clarke very much liked.  
  
Clarke nodded sleepily.  
  
"You're going to take a nap." Lexa tapped her nose and Clarke made a face, again feeling like a child instead of an adult but she couldn't even hold back a yawn. Lexa continued. "I'll curl up with you and when you wake it should be dinnertime."  
  
"Won't be bored?" It concerned Clarke, that Lexa would be stuck here bored out of her skull while Clarke adjusted to being an omega, to the heightened senses, the sensitivity, and everything else.  
  
Another smile, finally. "No Clarke, I won't be bored."


	6. Chapter 6

Dinner was bland chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans that had seen better days, a hard roll, and apple juice - the kind that came in a bottle and was probably terrible for her. Clarke couldn't help the face she made taking it all in.  
  
Lexa noticed - how could she not? - and snickered. "I know it doesn't look all that appetizing, but you have to eat." Leading by example Lexa took a slow bite of her own meal, which Clarke's overworked senses saw as much more sensual an action than it probably was.  
  
Clarke gulped and focused on the tray. It wasn't awful, she'd certainly had worse meals, but it was very... _meh_. She picked at the mushy, unappealing green beans. _Like the rest of this meal, they make me anything but hungry. Ugh. I swear it even smells boring._  
  
 _Since when did I get so picky?_  
  
"Don't make me feed you Clarke." The alpha's tone is somewhat serious but all Clarke can imagine is Lexa using her fork as an airplane and laughter bubbles out from her throat. It makes the other woman raise an eyebrow but she doesn't comment, thankfully.  
  
Her head is too fuzzy, both from the nap and presenting in general, to explain that she's just being goofy. It makes her wish she could rewind back to the moment when she'd just woken up, more content than she'd been in a long time, curled up against Lexa's back. The whole room had smelled like them, infusing the air, and Clarke knew her skin had to be soaked in Lexa's scent - a thought that made her purr.  
  
Which was a weird thing, to be completely honest.  
  
But it didn't pull her away from that cozy, happy haze. She could have lied their forever just basking in the heady combination of warmth and scent. Then the nurse had come, her scent bitter-sharp, and that feeling had fled. Already Clarke could feel the edge of her headache intruding.  
  
At least she could think now, sort of, thanks to Lexa's continued presence.  
  
It was a bit of an evolutionary throwback (much like dynamics) that presenting alphas/omegas were eased through the transition if they had someone of the opposite dynamic there while they presented. The generally accepted theory on that was that it was to encourage mating and bonding but it wasn't conclusive. So little about dynamics was.  
  
Whatever the reason (she was not thinking about mating or bonding, thank you very much) Clarke was extremely grateful Lexa was there. It would have been so awkward to be sitting in this room with a stranger... even though Lexa technically _was_ a stranger, wasn't she?  
  
Clarke forced herself to finish her plate, resenting every mouthful and grimacing with each swallow. The only thing she tolerated was the apple juice they gave her to wash it down with. Lexa noticed and handed hers over, smiling encouragingly.  
  
As she ate Clarke tried very hard not to think about how she felt about that smile, about how quickly her defenses had been breached. Especially when the person responsible was a professor. _Her_ professor.  
  
Overall, it was making her tense as hell, which was a nice change from sleepy and out of it, but she almost preferred the latter since it didn't come with overthinking everything and the throbbing headache.  
  
Lexa seemed to pick up on Clarke's change of emotions, waiting until the nurse took their plates away before bringing it up. "You seem uneasy."  
  
Without the distraction of their (awful) meal Clarke fumbled for something else to do but talk. Like, anything. Helpfully her brain had suggestions but she ruthlessly ignored them because A) she was pretty sure that was a bad idea B) the walls probably weren't soundproofed and C) nobody could bend that way. So, talking it was. "I don't know you." She picked at the hemline of her borrowed sweater unhappily, feeling awkward and stupid and silly to even be thinking about it.  
  
"Well, what do you want to know?" Clarke's head popped up, surprised. She'd expected Lexa to be less... open? _It's probably because she does this all the time and is used to being asked questions._ The thought made her unhappy, headache growing to the point where the light was hurting her eyes. She wished she'd thought to ask the nurse for aspirin.  
  
Giving up on the loose string she laid back on the bed, watching Lexa as the alpha watched her. _She has gorgeous eyes. Like, damn._ "Anything." Her voice comes out way breathier than intended. _Shit_. Clarke can feel herself breathing heavier, stimulated by the view, so she cleared her throat and looked at the ceiling instead. "Listening to you helps." A half-truth.  
  
The alpha gave her a devastating smile. (okay so maybe Clarke peeked, so sue her) "Since you finished your meal I suppose I'll tell you anything you like."  
  
"And if I hadn't?" She can't help flirting. It's impossible not to.  
  
"Then you'd answer my questions." Clarke is pretty sure that Lexa is teasing her but she wants to _hope_ she's also flirting back. Because that definitely sounded like flirting. _Oh god I really am acting like one of those omegas. Dammit._  
  
"I guess... I mean, who are you? Besides Lexa and my professor?" Clarke grabbed a pillow and propped herself up against the headboard, trying to seem less interested than she was.  
  
"Well," Lexa sat next to her, clearly thinking about what to say. "As you know I'm Alpha Zero. The first. It's not a commonly known fact. I try not to tell people because it makes them... fawn, I suppose." Clarke could see how it might. "I'm 24 years old. I like hiking, being out in the woods with my dog. I've always liked nature but after... well, it became like a second home. I didn't feel like such a freak there." The brunette shifted down a bit, settling in, before turning her attention back to Clarke.  
  
"I'm not a real professor, not really. I was given an honorary degree sort of by default - I know more about alphas than anybody else, and a lot about omegas. It's why I teach classes on the subject but that's it. My actual diploma is in history." She seemed uncertain now, biting at her lip. "I'm not sure what else you want to know. I'm pretty boring."  
  
Clarke shook her head, failing to hide how she swallowed every crumb Lexa gave her like it was a meal she could survive on for months. "I like nature too. My friends and I go camping a lot, but that's more of an excuse to kick back." Octavia was the one who started that up. She'd always been half-wild and nothing made her happier than a weekend in the woods. "Do you like teaching?"  
  
She shrugged offhandedly. "I feel like it's my responsibility to help where I can. We need doctors who understand how to treat alphas and omegas, who understand how they'll behave in medical situations, and it's information I can provide. I actually co-teach with a close friend of mine, an omega named Anya. She's the one covering my classes while we're here." Clarke remembered hearing that name before. The newly awoken omega side of her did not like _that_ one bit.  
  
Even as her brow furrowed unhappily Clarke felt the words spilling out of her mouth. "Is she your...?" _I can't believe I just asked that. It's so rude! What's wrong with me? I'd like to go back to not being able to talk now._  
  
Lexa didn't seem offended, only shaking her head in the negative. She didn't even comment on Clarke's prying question. "No, I don't have a mate." For a moment it seemed like she'd continue but for whatever reason Lexa went quiet.  
  
"Oh." Despite being the one to ask to know more Clarke was struggling to find questions to ask. Part of it was her headache, but the other part... it felt like she'd always known Lexa and didn't need to ask anything else. Except. "Were you scared, in that hospital?"  
  
Lexa swallowed, eyes falling to the bedspread. "Yes, I was." It's a soft admission. "I didn't know what was happening. Everything hurt and I was scared and confused. It's why I stay with presenting omegas when I can - I know what it feels like for your body to change that way." Sincere eyes met with Clarke's and she fell a little bit in love.  
  
Though Clarke didn't like that she was just another omega to Lexa.  
  
Sensing the tension had returned she moved closer, putting a gentle hand on Clarke's knee. "I said something wrong, didn't I?"  
  
"No, it's stupid. Hormones." There were actual tears in her eyes. _This is absurd. I am not crying over something so... so... ugh! Not crying! This is me, not crying._  
  
"Please tell me?" Those damn eyes could just about convince anybody to do anything, Clarke was sure of it. _Nobody should be able to work the puppy dog look like that. It should be illegal._  
  
"I'm just another omega." _And I don't want to be that to you._ Roughly Clarke wiped at her eyes, making sure not a single tear fell. _I hate hormones. I hate them with a fiery passion._  
  
"You're not just anything, Clarke Griffin." Lexa squeezed her knee before sitting up and patting the space in front of her. "Here, sit up and move over here."  
  
Clarke couldn't help narrowing her still-wet eyes. "Why?"  
  
"Are you always this suspicious?"  
  
"Yes." But Clarke obeyed. Lexa got up and opened the black bag near the door; Indra must have brought it in while they slept. She pulled out a brush and came back to the bed, sitting behind Clarke while she began brushing the omega's blonde hair - long, sure strokes that felt _amazing_.  
  
Lexa brushed her hair for a long time, until it must have been gleaming, before she stopped. It made Clarke whimper, missing the feeling, but that's when Lexa started to braid her hair. Small, intricate things that came together so simply. There was something comforting about it, such a small gesture, but Clarke felt the care in it. "What do you do with them? The other omegas?"  
  
The alpha paused, tying one of the braids with a small hair tie she must have grabbed when she retrieved the brush. "Watch tv, lie with them while they sleep. Sometimes I read outloud. They usually aren't very lucid throughout the process. You're different."  
  
"Good different?" Clarke was smiling again, feeling like herself even though her head still hurt. It amazed her that Lexa knew just what to do to bring her back to level.  
  
Even though she couldn't see it, she knew Lexa was smiling to when she playfully tugged one of the braids. "Very."  
  
The next half an hour was spent quietly, neither of them needing to break the silence. By the time Lexa finished Clarke had started to yawn again, more and more frequently, so they lied back down on the bed, Clarke's back to Lexa's front, and within moments Clarke was asleep - her last thought being a hope that Lexa fell asleep with her instead of lying there wide awake, bored out of her mind.  
  
When she woke up in the middle of the night Lexa was there, rubbing comforting circles in her back while she whimpered and buried her head under Lexa's chin. She wanted to say thank you but her throat felt so tight, and her brain was mush again. All she could do is faintly purr, which was still weird, but it was an omega thing and she wasn't going to try and figure out how she felt about it right now.  
  
When she could finally talk, the pre-dawn light leaking through the blinds, Clarke's voice was small. "What will it be like, when it's over?"  
  
She could faintly see the outline of Lexa, her hair wild and unkempt after a long night, the blanket resting against her hips. Clarke wished she could see more of her face, wanting to know if the alpha was annoyed with her or not, but shadows conspire against her, revealing only her gleaming eyes.  
  
The answer that comes is an honest one. "Your senses will be stronger than they were, not just smell. You'll probably have to buy new clothes."  
  
"Great." Clarke had never been much of a shopper so the idea is a daunting one. _Good thing there's omega specialty stores or I'd be totally lost._  
  
Lexa shifted, stretching lazily. "It's not so bad. Your sense of taste will be better, you'll be able to see clearer than before. Better hearing too." Slowly the alpha gathered Clarke close, something she'd done during the night as well. The gesture makes Clarke tear up ( _again_ ) because she feels so safe, like this is the only place she belongs, but it's not real and it _hurts_.  
  
Once she's done presenting she's going to lose this. It's enough to make her want to cry for real but she won't allow herself. _I'm stronger than this, omega or not. Once my hormones settle I bet I won't even think about Lexa except as my teacher. Until then..._ even in her head she can feel what a crock of shit _that_ is.  
  
Lexa appears to be waiting for an answer. _Oh, right._ "Lucky me." Clarke snuggled up close, wanting to ask the question that's been bothering her the most (well, the second one - the first being if Lexa is feeling this incredible pull to be with her like Clare feels) but unable to face her when she does. It's just so... awkward. "And... and heats. I know what the textbooks say but..."  
  
Strong hands run down her back, reassuring her. "I can only tell you what I know from Anya. They're unpleasant, but not impossible. She works through hers." That has Clarke perking up and praying that she's like that. Not all omegas are that lucky. Some are absolute messes during their heats, with symptoms ranging from uncontrollable rage to trying to fuck anyone they can.  
  
 _Come on universe, please don't do that to me. Give me normal heats and I'll... well. I don't know, work extra hard? Be a good doctor-omega-person?_ "That's the part I'm worried about. Although, with all of these laws they're talking about..."  
  
For the first time Lexa is angry, but not with her. Clarke can feel it in the way she stiffens, holding Clarke tighter than before. Her voice is harder. "Laws written by foolish alphas. We're lobbying against them."  
  
"We're?" Clarke tilted her head back, relieved that it's light enough for her to see Lexa again. It seems important now that she's talking about something that she's so passionate about. She can't help wanting to know more about Lexa, like there's a little gremlin in the back of her mind prodding her to find out every little thing she can.  
  
Lexa's hands continue to run up and down Clarke's back as she talks. "First wave alphas, mostly. There's a group of us that have been staging protests. A few are even politicians speaking out against them. It isn't right."  
  
After a long talk about the First Wave Alphas group Lexa founded the pair spend most of the day sleeping and talking about everything, really. Movies, alpha/omega dynamics, even family.  
  
Lexa reveals that she has a younger brother she hasn't seen in years because her parents are afraid she'll make him present. That her parents think of her as an accident, a freak. The pain in her voice when she says that makes Clarke want to kiss her until she smiles, but she doesn't because it's not allowed. "We text and call one another, but it isn't the same. I miss him."  
  
When Clarke's fever spikes back up Lexa sings her lullabies and braids her hair again.  
  
On the third day the door cracked open just after her morning vitals check, revealing three familiar faces. Faces that shouldn't have been there. Clarke sat up, smiling through her worry. She was happy that she could at least talk right now because this situation had the potential to be bad. Super, super bad.  
  
The alpha beside her was on the defensive, calmly putting herself between the perceived threat and Clarke until Clarke put a hand on her arm trying to convey the message that these were friends, not food, before she turned her attention back to the door.  
  
"Please don't tell me you guys broke in to a clinic."  
  
The silence is damning.


	7. Chapter 7

Clarke glanced at Lexa, mind slogging through the heavy weight that was presenting in an effort to make this situation _not_ terrible while all three of her friends began talking at once.  
  
Raven started, animated as always, looking to the others for backup. "We were worried! You always text us. Or call us. Something." She looked uneasy, a rare thing for the cocky engineering major. It made Clarke think that Raven hadn't been on board with this plan, whatever it was. If she had been she definitely would have dragged Finn along.  
  
"Raven called me and asked if I'd seen you, and I hadn't, so I called Murphy-" Octavia looked towards Murphy, who continued without pause. Unlike Raven, Octavia showed zero guilt or remorse for breaking in to the clinic. Knowing the alpha's past, it would take a lot more to phase her than that. Octavia had definitely done worse.  
  
"-and I showed up at Bellamy's door since _SOMEBODY_ wouldn't - he's shacked up with some really agro girl by the way - to make sure he hadn't gone all crazy and kidnapped you, but no dice." He shrugged, as if that explained everything from that moment to having them all three standing in Clarke's room.  
  
Maybe in Murphy-speak it did, but Clarke needed a little bit more to go on to even begin unraveling this latest escapade so she gave them all her patented Mom Look and they continued.  
  
Octavia picked up the threads though she was now looking at Lexa, frowning. "We didn't want to call your mom so we called Wells to see if you'd had some kind of breakdown and gone to see him." While she was annoyed by the idea that they'd even consider her having a breakdown Clarke didn't interrupt. _Although we're so having a talk. I do not have breakdowns. I fix breakdowns. I am the biggest breakdown fixer-upper in the whole universe!_  
  
"When he confirmed you weren't with him and he hadn't heard from you either, well, we decided to have Raven hack in to the school's main frame. You were flagged as presenting so now... we're here."  
  
Awkward silence followed. Raven was staring at the ground, hand rubbing her neck. Murphy was fiddling with his sleeve. Only Octavia looked at ease - look being the operative word. Clarke could see the few tells the girl had: chewing on her lip, shifting left and right.  
  
"In hindsight, we might have panicked." Raven _might_ have even looked sheepish by the admission.  
  
Naturally Octavia had no such qualms. She never really had. To her rules were a waste of time, there to annoy her or tempt her in to breaking them. Now that they'd explained she was already moving on to a new subject. "Just who is that?"  
  
Typical alpha behavior, spotting a 'threat' and calling it out. In this case Clarke really wished Octavia hadn't because now she had to explain. That was a lot harder said than done feeling the way she was. More so when she had no idea how to explain.  
  
She settled for simplicity. "This is Lexa. She's..." Briefly her gaze met Lexa's uncomfortably. "-helping me get through this." Not that it was a lie, Lexa _was_ helping her. But there was more to it than that and they both knew it. _At least, I know it. Does Lexa?_  
  
Clarke didn't have time to have that little debate in her mind because Octavia aggressively jumped on to the 'help' Lexa was providing. "Lexa." Octavia might as well have been saying Enemy Number One.  
  
Smelling blood in the water Murphy joined Octavia in frowning at the stranger in their midst, hand ghosting over the pocket Clarke knew possessed some kind of knife. It was a habit he'd never broken, not even after years of being free from the physical violence of his past. Ordinarily it made Clarke melt and want to hug him - even now, sluggish and bogged down by the chemicals in her body - but it wasn't the right moment.  
  
Not when two of her three best friends seemed to be seriously considering harming her... well, _Lexa_.  
  
Even the idea of them hurting Lexa made Clarke want to sob or go on the offensive, but Clarke wouldn't let herself get distracted by emotions, especially not now when she was feeling everything so strongly. "Yes, Lexa." She scooted closer to the alpha, just to make the point that she was a friend, not food. "Lexa, who understands that you didn't break any laws or school policies or anything like that and that you're going to get out of here before you all get busted!"  
  
Dainty-looking Raven looked a whole lot more tough when she crossed her arms and arched her eyebrow just right. She looked downright ferocious. _Kind of like now._ "Why would she care?"  
  
Following suit Murphy and Octavia each took some kind of aggressive stance like this was the freaking OK Corral. _Great, now they're all giving Lexa that look._  
  
Clearly choosing to ignore the hostility - thank _god_ \- Lexa glanced at Clarke before she shrugged and answered the trio's question. "I'm a professor here."  
  
Raven and Murphy both spoke at the same time: "Shit."  
  
As students, their response was perhaps predictable.  
  
"Professor?"  
  
Octavia's eyes narrowed, uncowed by the idea. Possibly because she wasn't a a student but mostly because that's just how Octavia was.  
  
The entire situation was draining what energy Clarke had left but she rallied. "Guys, I love you, I do, but... it's really overwhelming to be around anyone but her right now." It wasn't even a lie. Clarke's nose was burning from all the different smells, she could feel herself sweating, and her head was pounding again.  
  
That was enough to get Octavia to stand down, immediately contrite. She could be a difficult little shit but she had a good heart when it mattered. Once she thought her presence was hurting Clarke she was ready to make it better. "Oh shit, I didn't even think about that. I'm really sorry Clarke."  
  
Raven and Murphy mumbled their own apologies. It was clear that Raven was relieved and had come only after being worked up in to a frenzy by Octavia and maybe Murphy. She could only imagine the three of them together, slowly panicking more and more because their cornerstone had vanished. Clarke couldn't imagine how that felt.  
  
"Okay, we get it. Get lost." Raven was smiling, back to her cheeky self.  
  
Unlike the girls, omega Murphy was less sure. He'd scooted towards the door slightly (they all had, the moment they realized Clarke needed space from their scents) but he was still uncertain, reaching nervously for his pocket again. He could be an asshole most of the time, less rude than Octavia but more mean-spirited, but for the people he cared about? He'd do terrible, terrible things.  
  
It was why he hesitated now, wanting to be absolutely sure before he left Clarke to the unknown element that was Lexa. She didn't doubt for a second that, had she for some reason said the word, he'd have attacked without question.  
  
Standing on shaky legs Clarke approached and wrapped her arms around him, hugging the other omega tight. Making him feel both her love and her safety with Lexa. "I'm fine Murph, really." Once she let him go she hugged Octavia and Raven in turn, unable to help noticing the scents she hadn't before.  
  
Ocatvia smelled citrusy, like oranges or lemons. Sharp, tangy, bright.  
  
Murphy smelled like... like hot sand, maybe, or the aloe plant in her dorm.  
  
Raven wasn't presented. She shouldn't have smelled like anything. But underneath the motor oil and metal there was something there. _Vanilla?_  
  
Clarke shook her head and pulled away, stepping back from the group. "And please, send a message in the group text that I'm okay?"  
  
"Will do Captain." Raven went so far as to salute and then they were gone, hopefully not caught by any of the nursing staff because Clarke would really _hate_ to have to play lawyer in order to get them off scot-free.  
  
Sighing she went back to the bed and dropped at Lexa's side, brow furrowed in thought. She wanted to relax, to crawl back in to the cozy bubble the two of them had made, but she couldn't drop her concerns. _Was there something wrong with Raven? Was it possible that alphas and omegas could smell diseases but they didn't know it?_  
  
As she usually did, Lexa noticed the tension and started massaging Clarke's scalp. "What is it Clarke? Are their scents giving you a headache?"  
  
She shook her head in the negative, still thinking. Finally she turned and looked up at Lexa. "Aren't unpresented people not supposed to smell like anything?"  
  
The alpha tilted her head and continued running her hands along Clarke's scalp soothingly. She didn't seem to understand what had Clarke upset. "They don't. Betas, however, often smell faintly of vanilla."  
  
 _Oh thank god. I couldn't handle it if Raven-_ Clarke bolted upright. "Wait... betas? I thought that was just a term for people who hadn't presented." The student part of Clarke was fascinated, stamping down the omega side that just wanted to bury her nose in Lexa's neck and breath deep.  
  
There was a fond smile hiding at the edges of Lexa's lips. "It is, but in the future it will hopefully be correctly given to those who have presented as betas, they just don't know it because betas don't present so drastically. For them it's like a flu. They feel poorly and have a mild headache for two or three days and that's it."  
  
"But why haven't... people should know that! It's why classes like yours are so important!" She was struggling against the need to lie down, to curl herself around Lexa because her body needed it, even demanded it, but the idea that there was a whole other dynamic that the world wasn't even acknowledging? It was groundbreaking.  
  
Clarke asked more questions until she felt herself going nonverbal again, overwhelmed by her friend's scents swirling around the room. Finally she gave in, whimpering and burying her face in Lexa's neck as she'd wanted to before, soaking up the comfort the alpha provided.  
  
Later, after dinner, Clarke wanted to take a bath but was too anxious to be by herself in the small room. They tried cracking the door but it wasn't enough, Clarke needed Lexa there, touching... finally they compromised (Lexa was proving to be oddly modest) by having Clarke wear a sports bra and underwear while Lexa sat on the edge of the tub.  
  
It felt oddly domestic. Lexa even washed her hair, it felt heavenly and so... right? They didn't talk, just sat together and enjoyed the moment, aware that their time together was coming to a close.  
  
Later when they were lying on the bed again, Clarke's back to Lexa's front, Lexa finally asked about their unexpected visitors. "Those people who came, they're your friends?"  
  
Clarke's voice was sleepy. "Yeah, the Hundred."  
  
"The Hundred?" Lexa's confusion was evident and her arms tightened around Clarke's middle almost possessively.  
  
The omega didn't mind, sighing happily and melting in to Lexa's hold. "Can I explain later?" She yawned widely, not fighting sleep.  
  
"Of course, though now I am _very_ curious."


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter did not want to be written. At all. I've seriously written and re-written it four times. This is my favorite version, even if it's shorter than the others, so I hope you enjoy!

After four long days of presenting, her body settled in to it's new normal. It was four golden, heady days, wrapped in a safe cocoon she'd managed to build up with Lexa and the idea of leaving it was unappealing. So much so that the idea made her throat tight with anxiety. She thought: _I have to face the world now._ And then: _I don't want to go._  
  
Lexa sensed her hesitation as she always did and patted the bed in front of her. This time Clarke went without hesitation, folding up neatly while Lexa brushed and braided her hair. It was done more simply, as Lexa wouldn't be there to help her undo it later, but never the less it offered the same comfort Clarke had begun to associate with the action. With Lexa too. _And now I won't have it._  
  
The alpha tied off the strands, one hand brushing Clarke's neck lightly. "And there you are." Her voice was so soft, softer then it had ever been, Clarke was sure of that. Never mind the fact that she hardly knew Lexa, her newfound instincts made her positive of so many things and most of them scared her.  
  
She shifted to see Lexa's face, finding her smiling but it looked forced. Unnatural. It seemed that Lexa wasn't so keen to let go either. _I want to believe that so much._ "I wish we could stay." The words are blurted out before Clarke can consider them and she's already scrambling for a way to take them back, because _oh my god_ , when Lexa responds. _God she must think I'm the most clingy omega in the history of ever._  
  
"I know Clarke... but the world is waiting. You can't be a doctor sitting in this room." _That's the biggest non-answer in the goddamn word._  
  
She was right. Of course she was. Clarke knew that. _Still_. "What about..." Her hand gestured vaguely between the two of them, as though it could explain the almost soul-crushing tether Clarke felt between them. Surely Lexa felt it, the connection, binding them up so tightly together that just the thought of not having Lexa there to smile and braid her hair and hold her through the night was _impossible_. Even acknowledging it was hard to do, but she couldn't leave this room without doing so. She needed to know where she stood.  
  
Clarke watched as Lexa's face shut down, suddenly cold and unreachable and she wanted nothing more than to reach forward and brush it away, hating that she'd put it there in the first place. It was wrong to see the alpha so remote and untouchable, like she'd gone somewhere far away were Clarke couldn't follow. _Come back._  
  
Of course Clarke's brain is thinking: _she's totally working up to telling me to fuck off isn't she. Oh my god that's exactly what she's doing. I'm such an idiot. That's me, Clarke Griffin the omega moron. I'm going to die of mortification. Right now._ But all Lexa said was. "I'm your teacher Clarke. It wouldn't be appropriate."  
  
That wasn't a no. Confused and hopeful Clarke went to straightening the room while Lexa gathered her things and packed them back up. _What is she trying to tell me? Think Clarke, think!_ They were both very carefully avoiding one another, the air suddenly too tension and murky to navigate. _I can't leave it like this. Be brave, damn it._  
  
Against her better instincts (but in line with her not-so-great ones) Clarke reached out and grabbed Lexa's arm before they left, sounding so much more certain than she felt. "You do feel it." It isn't even a question.  
  
Calmly Lexa let go of the door handle, making sure it is shut firmly before turning back to Clarke and staring at her with such unabashed longing that it almost hurt to see. _It's not just me._ That was enough. Clarke surged forward, giving in to the urge to feel those soft lips on hers. She couldn't leave her without kissing her. She couldn't. She'd _die_.  
  
After a brief moment of hesitation Lexa deepened the kiss, shifting them both and practically slamming Clarke against the door. _Fuck_. It's hands and teeth and everything. Just... it's _everything_. She can feel herself falling in to the kiss, thinking of it as Act I, imagining what the rest of it will be like - what it'll _feel_ like - when this first kiss makes her whole body feel like it's on goddamn fire.  
  
But then it's over, all at once, a sharp flood of coldness, and Lexa is stepping back, slipping on a carefully neutral expression. _No! No, no, no!_ "No Clarke, we can't. I'm your professor and that's _enough_."  
  
So help her, Clarke feels her bottom lip jut out poutily. She wants to argue. To scream. Because her body is saying that this is so right, that they're supposed to be touching eachother, holding eachother, being with eachother. It hurts to be pushed away, but she also understands - and prays that Lexa means that eventually they'll be able to explore their connection more once Clarke is no longer her student.  
  
 _She'd better mean that._


	9. Chapter 9

It's been a week since she was standing in front of this exact same door.  
  
Clarke had spent the days in between The Kiss and now attending classes and catching up on what she'd missed - which was a lot, given her course load and the demanding, competitive nature of Arkadia.  
  
It had been surprisingly easy despite the gaping hole at her side that was Lexa. She missed her, she missed her like _hell_ , but she just didn't have time to properly Romeo-and-Juliet miss her, not when she was in a program as brutal as the advanced studies classes. Not when Lexa's words were rapid fire and deadly, flying over Clarke's head so quickly she despaired of ever taking complete notes.  
  
So she missed her, but it was a quiet thing, a lonely, burning hum at the back of everything. And she didn't flinch when Lexa refused to look at her, swallowing heavily and leaving the classroom - and she didn't even _stomp_.  
  
Later, a-wash with self-pity and admittedly regretting the stomping (shut up) Clarke ran directly in to Monty, spilling their collective papers, books, and binders. "Shit, I'm so sorry I wasn't paying attention-"  
  
"No, it's okay, I wasn't either." They gathered everything up before Monty offered an apologetic smile. "About the other day... I'm really sorry. It was uncool, how I acted." He shifted in place, clearly nervous. "I have the biology notes from the class you missed, actually, if you wanted them."  
  
"That would be great, thanks. And don't worry about it, really." Clarke smiled, strangely glad to see him. Another tenuous connection to Lexa. _Who won't even look at me or text me or even freaking email me because she is clearly a sadist._ Ignoring her inner monologue she went ahead and asked the obvious. "Are you headed to lunch too?"  
  
He nodded, pleased she wasn't going to hold a grudge. Though why she would have, well, Clarke didn't know. It wasn't like he'd done anything particularly rude; in his place she might have been just as fascinated. (not might have: would have) "Yeah, you want to come with?" The offer seemed genuine and not borne out of guilt so Clarke took it easily - it was in her nature to collect people and it seemed that Monty would be one of them.  
  
After they grabbed food from the cafeteria - pizza for Clarke because calories were _delicious_ , some kind of fruit and salad thing for Monty - he led her over to a table with a lanky, dark-haired boy and an equally dark-haired girl already sitting down, flirting as only the newly dating can.  
  
Monty introduced them and shared a look with Clarke that clearly said ' _please don't leave me with them it's the worst'_. "Jasper, Maya, this is Clarke. Clarke, this is Jasper and Maya."  
  
"Hey, nice to meet you."  
  
Jasper offered a quick, bright smile, unkempt hair falling over his eyes. "Clarke huh? Let me guess... aspiring scientist?"  
  
Clarke shook her head, confused by the question. "Doctor."  
  
With an overly dramatic sigh Jasper looked to Monty and then Maya, as if looking for some impossible, life-changing answer. "Damn. Why do I always guess wrong?"  
  
"Probably because you always guess scientist?" While Maya seemed amused Monty didn't seem all that willing to play - though Clarke could see that the pair were close despite their differences.  
  
Jasper rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to Clarke. "Ugh. Whatever. Do me!"  
  
His phrasing left _much_ to be desired. "Uhhhh..."  
  
"Don't make it weird, just guess!" All of his wild gesturing and playful, random questions were charming, admittedly. He reminded her of some of the Hundred. The way he seemed to be looking for meaning, even with his lighthearted questions there was an intensity there...  
  
"Philosophy?"  
  
His jaw actually _dropped_. "YOU HAVE A SUPER POWER." He was fidgeting in his sit, like a toddler trying to behave themselves in order to get a special treat, and it was eight kinds of adorable. "Oh my god do Maya too." Jasper grabbed his girlfriend's shoulders, offering her up for Clarke's supposed power.  
  
Given the bit of blue paint flecked near her eye and all over her hands this guess was a lot easier. "...art?"  
  
"Monty, we're keeping her. She has a gift." Monty pretended to smash his head on the table and groaned while Maya rolled her eyes before bopping Jasper's nose.  
  
"Jasper, I'm covered in paint and you practically scream philosophy major at the top of your adorable lungs."  
  
Just like that the pair of them were cocooned in one another and it made something ache within Clarke, something she suspected was envy. _Damn you Lexa. This isn't supposed to be my life, pining after you like some idiotic schoolgirl. I mean, I am a schoolgirl but NOT LIKE THAT._  
  
"You think my lungs are adorable?" Jasper was smiling like she was the sun. _Probably the same way I smile at Lexa. From this point of view it's mildly embarrassing._  
  
Monty pulled the pair of them back in to the conversation after it was obvious they were just going to stare at eachother. "This is why nobody wants to eat lunch with us."  
  
Newly-omega Clarke laughed, digging in to her pizza. "I think kidneys are cuter than lungs, if I had to state a preference."  
  
"Maya, my heart, would you be offended if I said I love her?" Jasper slung a shoulder around Maya, the pair of them smiling at Clarke.  
  
"No, but only because you're ridiculous and she's much too brilliant for you."  
  
And so it went. By the end of their lunch everybody had exchanged numbers, promising to make their lunch a regular occurrence. It was one of the best days she'd had since... since Lexa. It wasn't like Clarke didn't have friends, it was just that most of them were in school too and with conflicting classes and everything it was hard to get together. It was nice having a few new faces around.  
  
 _Now, if only getting Lexa to come around while surviving my massive amounts of homework was so easy._


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bold - texts  
> Italics - thoughts

The number is supposed to be for emergencies, or questions about class. Clarke knows that. Of course she knows that. She's an adult, a future professional. She's not going to do anything stupid with a number given to her in an educational setting. No way. She's just not. She's far too mature and sensible and reasonable and.... _fuck_.  
  
She texts Lexa. It's not like she can even help it. Even drowning in schoolwork her body wants, and wants, and wants. It aches for Lexa in a way she wouldn't even be able to explain to herself if she hadn't been studying about alpha and omega bonds. Her compulsion to seek out the alpha was yet another confirmation that they were... something. What that something was, however...  
  
The text was brief, just a simple **hey, how are you?** Nothing damning, nothing a school administrator would see and flip out over. It's certainly not what she wanted to say which was more along the lines of 'I miss you so much I'm about to cry about it. again. because hormones are stupid.'  
  
Lexa's response is equally careful. **I am well. This is Clarke, correct?**  
  
 **Yeah, yeah it's me.** Clarke frowned at her phone, suddenly aware of how hard it was to try and have some kind of double-speak conversation with Lexa via text. Not that it's awkward enough to stop her. **I had a question about class.** **About what we discussed the other day.** _I really hope she gets what I'm actually talking about._  
  
Clarke chewed on her thumbnail while waiting for Lexa to text her back, nervous and anxious but also so damn happy because her alpha was talking to her, just her. This wasn't a classroom where Clarke was lost in a sea of scents and faces. True, it wasn't the presentation room either, but it was as good as they were going to get. For now.  
  
 **I'm not in my office, but I have time. What is your question?**  
  
 **What do we actually know, scientifically, about bonds?**  
  
The '...' lasts a long time, long enough that Clarke wonders if Lexa is writing her and essay or stalling. A notification on her phone lets her know she has a new email from lheda@arkadiauniversity.com. Inside is a link to a dozen or so articles, for once not a one written by Lexa, detailing what is known about pair bonding. Some are more focused on the chemical process while others delve in to the emotional and social aspects. She's skimming the second one when the text finally comes.  
  
 **Besides the list of articles I sent you, not very much.** _Not enough._  
  
 **Do you know what they feel like?** _How are you feeling about me? Please tell me, please._  
  
 **I've been told-** _Bullshit_ **that it feels like... like being complete. Like you had been missing a whole part of yourself and were unaware. Some believe Aristophanes was actually discussing alpha and omega bonding, that the dynamics existed during that time or something similar.**  
  
 **Is it true that being around your bondmate makes you feel like... like they're everything? Borderline obsession?**  
  
 **From what I understand, yes. It's why in a medical setting they must be kept together except in the most dire circumstances. It's thought that they can promote healing in one another, as well as emit calming pheromones that make treatment easier.**  
  
 **How do you know if you're bonded? I know traditionally there are marks, that the pair bite one another but is that it? Can a couple bond without that?** _Did we bond like that?_  
  
 **I don't know.**  
  
The uncertain statement has Clarke smiling more than she has all week - who knew the unknown could make a person so goddamn happy? Granted, she wanted very much to know, but Lexa was confirming that she felt it, that it was real, this wasn't a crush or something like that. _She feels it too._  
  
The conversation continues, always kept neutral, and it's almost like being back in the presentation room again. It wasn't enough, wasn't Lexa braiding her hair or Clarke being able to rest her head on the alpha's chest, but it was soothing and more than Clarke had gotten from Lexa all week. Finally she fell asleep, drifting off with a smile.  
  
In the morning she's horrified that she gave in and actually contacted Lexa. Can't believe she had the guts to do it. That she was going to do it AGAIN because she couldn't not text her. _Bonds are weird._


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all of my lovely commenters <3 I know you're all dying for some more Lexa/Clarke interaction and I promise, promise, promise it's happening next chapter!

"So this is where Bellamy's been stowed away at?" This being a squat, sturdy little brick house. It's a nice place, parted out as a triplex in order to give the owner a bit of extra cash, and Bellamy has been living in the basement apartment for over a year now. She can remember when he first rented it, how proud he was to have the keys in hand. His smile then had been so big and bright, it could have rivaled stars.  
  
_What happened to him? To us?_ Thinking about Bellamy now only made her angry, or sad. On some occasions she even hurt for him because she knew how lonely he was now that Octavia had cut him off. "Yep."  
  
Raven continued to stare at the building, as if it had answers to the riddle that was Suddenly A Massive Dick Bellamy. "Do you know if he's home?"  
  
"He'd better be. We agreed to meet here to exchange our stuff." _And if he's not I will feel zero remorse dumping his stuff at goodwill, even if it means losing my second favorite sweater._  
  
Raven glanced at her, eyebrow raised. "Why am I here again?"  
  
"Emotional support?" Clarke shrugged her shoulders, trying to avoid the subject. Naturally Raven didn't find that to be an acceptable answer.  
  
"Clarke Griffin since when have you needed backup? Ever?"  
  
"Since never, but..." _Fuck it._ "I've also never been an unmated omega about to meet my former boyfriend who is an alpha and an asshole." She stared at her hands, clenching them in her lap because she hated - _hated_ \- that part of presenting was... _this_. Needing a friend to come with her to pick up a few things at her ex-boyfriend's house because he was an alpha.  
  
The dark-haired girl was instantly angry, even the idea of Bellamy force-bonding Clarke enough to set off her notoriously short fuse. "You don't think he'd-"  
  
"No, no Bellamy wouldn't do that." _Hopefully. Even if he tried there's Lexa. Can a person even be bonded to two different people?_ "But he's going to pitch a fit. We both know it." _And the part of me that isn't afraid is going to get a lot of satisfaction watching him flip out._  
  
"Which is exactly why I'm here: I can't wait to see his face." Raven rubbed her hands together, cackling.  
  
Clarke snorted. "Gee, thanks Raven."  
  
"Oh shut up, you're dressed to kill and dying to see his face when he finds out too." _Fair point._  
  
Clarke doesn't answer, instead climbing out of the car and moving to the trunk where a box of assorted stuff that Bellamy left at her dorm is - it wasn't much, a few movies, a tshirt, but she thought it was only fair to give it back. She hands the box to Raven, who pretends to grunt and stagger, and together the pair make their way over to the house.  
  
When she knocks there's a few noises from inside but nobody opens the door. After a few awkward minutes she exchanges a glance with Raven - _what the hell?_ \- before knocking again, louder this time.  
  
Footsteps approach the door and it opens just enough to show the chain is there, revealing a muscular brunette with dark eyes and a lovely, somewhat impish face that's currently arranged in to a nasty scowl. "Yes?" Her voice is irritated, as if she was dreadfully busy.  
  
"Umm, is Bellamy there? We're supposed to-"  
  
"Yes, he is. And he's busy. With me."  
  
Unable to help herself she backs off a step, trying to show she's not here to fight over Bellamy. _Jesus, who would?_ "Whoa, we're not an item, he just has some of my stuff-"  
  
The door shuts, the chain is disengaged, and it opens fully to reveal the unhappy woman ( _vanilla - beta, she's a beta_ ) who looks fully ready to kick some ass. Clarke really has no time for this macho showdown shit. _Seriously, have at him honey. I've got something better._ "Listen, I don't care who you are, but Bellamy is with me now."  
  
Finally the man of the hour arrives, looking smug and satisfied with the little drama he'd enacted. The strange girl melts and practically shoots him heart eyes while Bellamy wraps his lean arms around her waist and nuzzles her neck. "It's okay Gina, she's just here for some of her crap."  
  
Bellamy looks up, and Clarke can see that he's rehearsed this moment. Practiced for it. That he'd intended to be scornful and dismissive, to maybe even bring up her formerly unpresented state. But that's all gone the second he smells her.  
  
He lets go of Gina so fast Clarke's amazed he doesn't get whiplash.  
  
"You presented? As an omega??"  
  
"Yeah, I did."  
  
His mouth is open in what might be shock and hell, Clarke's only human, it's _extremely_ gratifying to see.  
  
"How?" She's very, very tempted to say 'someone more alpha than you brought it out of me' but decides that, with the Lexa situation so up in the air and a secret anyway, she'd better not.  
  
"It just happened. Guess I just needed less _stress_ in my life."  
  
Raven looks ready to hi-five her. The girl - Gina? - looks a bit hurt to have been so easily ignored. She covers it well, stomping over to the couch to grab a box and exchange it for the one in Raven's arms, all while Bellamy and Clarke have a weird sort of staredown. When it's over Clarke sighs, wishing the situation wasn't... _this_. "Goodbye Bellamy."  
  
\---------------  
  
"How'd you do it?" Clarke resisted the urge to spit out something sarcastic like _'Oh, hi Clarke, how are you? It's only been three hours since I was a total bitch to you but that's all in the past_ ' but she's still a little stuck on the fact that Bellamy's rather aggressive girlfriend has managed to find her on campus.  
  
"Do what, exactly?" Though she's irritated Clarke manages to just barely hide it. The last thing she needs is to set the other woman off and get in to a full-on brawl in the middle of the damn courtyard. Honestly she doesn't even know what Gina wants or is alluding to.  
  
"Present." _Well, I got to hand it to her, she's concise._  
  
Of course that brings up a very difficult problem: how do you tell someone who already dislikes you on principle that they have presented when they've presented as something that isn't commonly known? "I..."  
  
The tough facade drops, slightly. It's very clear that Gina hates that she's resorting to asking Clarke about this, but Clarke can see the shame in her eyes, the fear. _I know what that's like, feeling broken._ "Please tell me, please. You don't know what it's like."  
  
"I do, actually." After that, silence.  
  
"Fine, don't tell me. Whatever." Gina crosses her arms and looks away, shoulders hunched. Everything about her posture screams fuck off.  
  
_Well, shit._ "Listen, it's not really anything I did." Clarke doesn't want to reveal her ties to Lexa, especially not someone with so much animosity towards her, but she can tell the truth without naming names. "I met someone, an alpha, and it sort of... kickstarted everything, I guess."  
  
"So you're saying Bellamy might help?" Gina looks so relived in that moment that Clarke feels her throat tighten with pity. It makes her decision easier: she has to tell her. Even if she doesn't believe it.  
  
"Listen, you know I'm pre-med, right?"  
  
The other girl scoffs. "I know everything about you. He talks about you constantly." The bitterness there is palpable.  
  
For the moment Clarke is sidetracked, appalled by that little tidbit. _Way to be an even bigger asshole, Bellamy._ "That's super shitty of him."  
  
"Yeah, I guess it is."  
  
"Anyway, the thing is- well- I'm trying to say-" Clarke stutters through attempting to explain to this strange girl that she's a beta. Despite their rocky introduction she finds herself liking the grumpy Gina and it's making it even harder to tell her because she knows it's going to hurt.  
  
"What? Spit it out."  
  
_Deep breath, you can do this. Giving bad news is part of being a doctor._ "You've already presented."  
  
Predictably, Gina explodes. "No I haven't, I'm not an alpha, not an omega, how could I have presented? Are you seriously making fun of-"  
  
Clarke shakes her head, holding her hands out in a show of reassurance. "No, I'm not, I _never_ would do that. But there's more than two dynamics. I'm honestly just learning about it in class, it's not well-known. But there's a third dynamic they're calling betas. That's what you are. My friend Raven is one too, the girl who came with me to Bellamy's."  
  
"Oh." There's so much feeling in that word. Hope and doubt and anguish because she wasn't going to be an omega, or an alpha. She was something in between that people didn't even know about. But she quickly faced it - Clarke had a feeling that Gina faced everything without flinching. "What does that mean then?"  
  
"I don't know." She hated to shrug, but it's the only thing she could think to do. She didn't know. Even after asking a million questions it was still hard to say just what being a beta meant. "But you're going to be okay." Cautiously, Clarke put a hand on Gina's shoulder, which was accepted.  
  
A week later Clarke gets a text from Gina: _fuck Bellamy, I deserve better._


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: So, I'm a bit of a snippet writer sometimes, which I probably should of stated. I really hate writing drawn out obvious-information conversations if they only exist to inform the characters, not the readers. That's why Clarke and Lexa talked a lot in the presentation room about 'everything' (presumably the situation with Bellamy, Lincoln being framed, etc.) without dragging on and on. It's also why they've also been texting and talking on the phone - to keep them updated about eachother's lives with going back over everything. (Although yes, I'm excluding some Lexa stuff for the Lexa POV story) Timeline wise this wasn't much of a jump. They're maybe a month in to the semester?
> 
> I am sorry that it seemed so disjointed, but I'd prefer not to take it out because it's not just a random event. From the beginning Clarke has been upset about Bellamy for framing Lincoln, her friend, for daring to mate/bond with his younger sister. It highlights just how scary possible omega laws can be, something Clarke has to worry about even more now that she's an omega herself. It's also the catalyst to break the ice, so to speak. I may go back and re-write older chapters to include further information but there really isn't much to tell outside of the actual how-it-happened story, which I feel like doesn't belong here?
> 
> Either way, I do apologize.

Clarke tried not to think of it as caving anymore. After all, it was important for her to touch base with her professor, wasn't it? _Not even I believe that line of crap._ Two rings and a familiar voice greeted her. "Hello Clarke."  
  
It isn't terribly late, but a lifetime of having manners drilled in to her head make Clarke reactively apologize. "Hey. Sorry for calling so late, you're probably in the middle of dinner-"  
  
"I'm not, but even if I am you know I don't mind." Lexa's voice sounds faintly amused. Clarke suspects that the alpha finds it cute whenever she rambles like that. _It's not cute. I am not cute. I'm... hot. Impressive. Gorgeous. Any word that does not describe a Disney animal._  
  
While she inwardly rants (something Clarke _swears_ Lexa knows about) she has to acknowledge that she does, in fact, know that Lexa wouldn't give a damn if Clarke called her in the middle of the night. They both need to hear one another daily, at least. _Though I'd be happy for it to be more than a phone call or awkward questions posed in class. Which is more than Octavia and Lincoln get now._ The idea is a depressing one. "I know."  
  
Immediately, Lexa's voice is deeper, sensing the quiet misery Clarke didn't voice. Didn't _have_ to voice. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Lincoln's trial is in a few days." While she talks Clarke opens her closet, reminded that she needs to pick out a suitable outfit for the event. _Something professional, something that will make her seem trustworthy. Maybe her blue dress?_  
  
"That's your friend, the one..." Lexa's voice trails off. So far she's hesitated to say anything about Bellamy, which is actually pretty impressive. Most alphas can't help but belittle those they see as competition. Then again, who could compete against Lexa? She probably knows that no one compares. The idea itself made Clarke want to argue for the sake of it, but she knew it was true and it was pointless to fight it.  
  
Still, tiptoeing around Bellamy is getting weird. "The one my ex-boyfriend had framed for daring to bond with his baby sister. Yeah."  
  
"Are you worried about him?"  
  
"Of course I'm worried! Lincoln's got a history and Bellamy's got a grudge and connections. They might not listen to an ex-addict no matter what I say." Clarke forces herself to sit on the bed to keep from pacing. She's already done enough of that tonight - which is what prompted her to call Lexa in the first place. But it's more than Lincoln, and they both know it. "And with the omega laws they're voting on this year I'm just... I guess I'm afraid. Not just for him, which sounds so selfish but what if they pass? What if more pass? What if they make it so I can't be a doctor? What if-"  
  
"Clarke, calm down. You're working yourself up over things you can't control. You're going to attend the trial and do everything you can for your friend, but the outcome is out of your hands." She sounds so sure. How can she be so sure? _Because she'll fight like hell for you, and for your rights._ She'd even give up her privacy - if Alpha Zero made it clear that she was against the omega laws they'd know doubt fizzle and die - but Clarke didn't want that for her- well. _Mate?_  
  
"But maybe if I say the right thing it _won't_ be." She'd swear she could feel the ghost of a touch running through her hair, calming her. Hell, maybe she did. Bonds were still largely undocumented. For example, as far as she knew no one had formed a bond without a bite. No one. Which meant that her and Lexa had something unique.  
  
"Clarke." Lexa's voice is soft, but chiding.  
  
"I know, I'm trying to control an impossible situation, but I can't help trying."  
  
"I know. It's one of the things I admire about you, your dedication and loyalty." Clarke could feel herself blushing over the unexpected compliment. She might have commented but she can hear a loud bark in the background, telling her it's time for Lexa to take her dog Captain on a run.  
  
"I guess you've got to go." She didn't want her to go.  
  
"Only if you're okay. Captain can wait, he has better manners than I give him credit for." Clarke highly doubted that. Captain was a gorgeous German Shepherd with zero patience, just a slobbering mess of dog. Clarke adored him. She only got to meet him once when she'd run in to Lexa on accident - and it _WAS_ an accident no matter what Lexa implied! - and had promptly wanted to steal him.  
  
She shook her head, giving in to her better angels for Captain's sake. "I'm fine, really. Just nervous but you're right, I can't do anything about it except do my best to make the jury or the judge or whoever see that Lincoln is a good guy."  
  
"You're saying that, but do you believe it?"  
  
"Not really."  
  
"I didn't think so." Lexa sighed and Clarke could picture her leaned against the counter, scratching Captain's ears, looking troubled at her inability to snap her fingers and make everything better. Her next words all but confirm it. "I wish I could make this easier, I know how important this is to you."  
  
"You are making it easier." _More than you know._ "No go run with Captain. I have to get to sleep anyway, I have a class in the morning."  
  
"Sleep well then, Clarke."  
  
"You too."

\-------------------

The courtroom was quiet, nothing like the high-drama she was expecting. Just a few dozen people standing in support of Lincoln and on the other side Bellamy, alone in the back and looking grim... but determined. Clarke knew that look. There's be no last minute admission of guilt from that end, even if they all knew what he'd done.  
  
_Dammit Bellamy._  
  
Beside her Octavia was stone-still, jaw clenched, eyes boring in to the few 'witnesses' they'd managed to dreg up, all stating that Lincoln was some kind of drug dealer. It was absurd, they were clearly all addicts themselves, probably bullied in to being there. But would the jury see that? Clarke didn't know.  
  
She was there as a character witness, to testify that the other omega was a good, solid man, and while he'd had his demons he'd overcome them. If she managed to say in so many nice, polite words that Bellamy had every reason to be lying, well, that wasn't her fault now was it?  
  
Raven was there too, and Murphy and Finn. A few of the others. But nobody could say for sure that they'd seen Bellamy place the drugs. It was up to them to convince the jury that he had without ever saying it, while making sure they understood that Lincoln was innocent. Even the drug test proved that but the prosecutor kept on with the dealing angle and it was harder to dispute than Clarke thought it would be.  
  
And then it came, the dreaded verdict: Lincoln was guilty.  
  
Because of time served he only had to go back for three months but it was _devastating_. Octavia hugged him tight, near-tears but trying so hard to be brave, and once they took him away she stormed out, cursing and on fire with rage.  
  
Clarke didn't even know what to do. She knew Octavia needed to cool down by herself, that there was nothing she could feasible do for Lincoln right now, but she felt so... helpless. Behind her she could hear heavy footsteps. Familiar ones.  
  
"Clarke?" Of all the people she wanted to see right now, Bellamy Blake was _not_ one of them. Not in the mood she was in. "Are... are you okay?"  
  
"What do you think?" She crossed her arms, trying not to scream at him because they were in a courtroom and surely there were rules about that kind of behavior. "I can't believe you just let them convict him, Bellamy. That's low."  
  
"He was guilty." Bellamy wouldn't meet her eyes while he said it.  
  
Clarke wasn't about to let it slide, either. She'd never let Bellamy get away with his bullshit before and it's part of why they'd been such good friends before, in the months after they'd first met. "But not of dealing drugs."  
  
"Look, I don't want to talk about it, okay? I just... I'm worried about you. Presenting can be tough. I know it was for me. I don't want you to be alone. You always push yourself so hard Clarke, take on so much. I... I want you to know you can still call me if you need anything, okay? Anything at all." He was so earnest about it too. Trying to be supportive. But he'd broke too much for them to move past it, at least not easily.  
  
Taking a deep, steadying breath, realizing that her friends were watching the scene (and probably preparing to intervene) and screaming was, again, off the table, Clarke pulled out the most truthful response she had. "I... I appreciate that offer, Bellamy, but right now all I want is my friend out of jail and you won't do that. You don't get to pretend it's not happening just because you don't like how we're all reacting."  
  
His shoulders slumped. "That's fair." Brown eyes looked up again, imploringly. "Still, don't be stubborn, okay? ...I miss you. I miss my best friend."  
  
Funny, she missed him too. How he used to be. Not this hard, brittle man he was now, so determined that he knew best that he was willing to lose everything over it. He didn't know that he'd never have some of those things back - Clarke knew beyond a doubt she was Lexa's, and Octavia... she held grudges. Had every right to. "I know, Bellamy. I miss you too. How you used to be." Idly she brushed lint off his jacket, an old gesture. "Have you talked to Gina at all?"  
  
"...Gina? No." Just like that, reality came crashing back in around them both, his utterly dismissive attitude shocking her. _They just broke up, how can he act like she's nothing?_ "Listen, Clarke-"  
  
"No, whatever it is... no. I can't do this right now. Goodbye Bellamy."  
  
She didn't look back.  
  
\-------------------  
  
"The trial didn't go well." She'd walked away from Bellamy, out the door, not sure where she was going but absolutely sure if she stayed she'd be getting an assault charge. And then she was standing in front of Lexa's office door, entering without knocking. Seeking the comfort of the alpha without even realizing it. "They found him guilty."  
  
"I'm so sorry. The character witnesses weren't enough?" Lexa gestured to the couch, following Clarke and sitting beside her. Neither really questioned why it felt so right, not at this point. But this was the first time they'd really seen one another alone since Clarke had presented. _This is not how I imagined this happening._  
  
"No." Clarke gulped, suddenly feeling like crying, both from the closeness and the frustrating situations - hers and Lincoln's. Lexa's hands reached out and Clarke went, slumping in to the alpha's side. "Octavia is a wreck, I know I should be looking for her but I can't. Bellamy talked to me and he's just... and then there's you. Pretending that... that." So help her, she _sniffled_.  
  
Lexa kissed the top of her head, gently rubbing Clarke's back. "I imagine, from what you've told me, she needs space." A pause, as though she isn't sure what to say to make their situation any better or easier. "I don't like it either, Clarke, believe me. You shine so brightly it's impossible not to hold you, to continue pretending we're not more than a student and teacher. I thought talking on the phone would help, but I find myself... missing you. Often."  
  
"I hate this."  
  
Lexa sighed, brushing her thumb across Clarke's lip. The door was shut, and locked, but this was still more than they should be risking. Anybody could knock on the door and suspect something was up by the sudden flush to Clarke's cheeks, the way her breathing had sped up. "We have to focus on the future. Dwelling doesn't help either of us."  
  
"I know." Clarke couldn't help it, she leaned up and her mouth met Lexa's, soft and sweet, a brush of lips. Lexa returned the gesture, pulling Clarke closer until the omega crawled in to her lap. "Tell me about the future, Lexa."  
  
Lexa smiled against Clarke's throat, biting down playfully. "We'll sleep in on Sundays, curled up together, soft and warm and safe." Lexa's hands were settled against Clarke's hips while Clarke's hands wandered everywhere they could reach. "I'll meet your terrifying mother and your mysterious Hundred. We'll go camping in the woods."  
  
It was all surprisingly domestic, but Clarke was panting anyway because she wanted that, all of that, so badly. She wanted to wake up with Lexa, to grumble her way out of bed for an early morning class before laughing at the alpha's bedhead. She wanted to have their families meet, their friends. She wanted their lives to mesh together until there was no splitting them.  
  
Warm fingers traced the skin above Clarke's skirt, drifted upwards before palming her breasts through her bra, making her gasp. They were definitely breaking their rules on behaving but it felt so fucking good, Clarke didn't want it to stop. "Lexa, more."  
  
They might have gone further but somebody really _did_ knock on the door, leaving them to scramble apart. Clarke might have cursed the unknown person just a _tiny_ bit before making a hasty exit.


End file.
